Have you ever compared yourself to someone else? I do it sometimes (actually too often) and it usually makes me feel like absolute crap about myself. It shouldn’t be like that. If you too feel like this and want to know how to stop comparing yourself to others, here are some tips that I have used and remember when I’m fighting that chick in the mirror.
My tips on how to stop comparing yourself to others
Us humans do it all the time — we compare our careers, our houses,our parenting styles, our talents, our social media feeds, and our partners. We always wonder what it’s like on that other side.
We also compare ourselves to others physically, almost without meaning to.
You’ve probably compared your looks, body image, and fitness level to those of other people. Sometimes the comparison makes you feel better about yourself, and sometimes you feel worse. It usually makes me feel much worse and in the past, would trigger a major emotional eating binge.
Often, the comparison game leads to unrealistic expectations about how your body should look and function. When you fall short, you become discouraged— or worse, you give up on your fitness journey altogether.
How can you have the right mindset about body image and fitness? I have a few tips that have helped me focus on my personal journey, rather than everyone else’s.
Shut Off Social Media
If staring at images of amazingly fit people on Facebook and Instagram is depressing you, don’t do it! Seriously, turn off the phone or close that window on your computer. Some booty’s were not meant to be that way…it’s okay.
Most of the social media images of models, actresses, and other celebrities are photo-shopped or edited in some way; and those women have professionals to do their makeup, hair, and styling.
So, comparing yourselves to these type of women is unrealistic.
If you get envious of how good your friends look on social media choose, remember that they too only post their best pictures, the ones with perfect lighting and the right pose.
Keep in mind that the photo you’re jealous of is probably not an accurate reflection of the person’s real life.
So take a break from social media when you need to!
Remember That Everyone Started Somewhere
It can be easy to compare yourself to people in the gym or running along the beach. But remember, these people weren’t born fit! They had to start somewhere too.
I know that in the gym it can be easy to compare yourself to other women – some are super fit, or strong, or can hold a plank longer than you do,etc.
But going to the gym isn’t about comparing. You’re there for YOU!
If being in a gym environment doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, why not workout at home!
I have plenty of different workouts that you can do in the comfort of your home (most of them don’t even require shoes!).
Or if you know that group classes are where you compare yourself the most, try doing your own workout instead of the class.
You might find something that you enjoy even more!
“Look at her— her abs/legs/arms look perfect. I feel so fat and flabby. Why do I even try? I’m never going to look like that.”
How’s that for negative self-talk? If this kind of thinking goes on in your head, it’s time for a change of tune. My inner fat girl is named Patrice, and sometimes, I have to tell her “shut up Patrice!” total HIMYM reference
Instead of cutting yourself down with comparisons, try encouraging yourself instead.
Think phrases like, “You’re doing it, girl! Stay strong! Push harder, move more. You’re amazing, and you can do it. You’ve come so far already!”
Leave the other person entirely out of the equation. She doesn’t matter right now— you matter. She’s doing her— you do you.
What Do You Love About Yourself?
I’m sure if someone asked you to point out the things you were most self-conscious about, you’d be able to list them off without even thinking!
We all have things about our body that we don’t like.
But if someone asked you to name the things that you love about yourself, could you think of anything?
It’s easy to just focus on fixing our flaws. But there are lots of amazing things about you! And these far outweigh the flaws.
I want you to think of 3 things that you love about yourself – right now! Leave them in the comments to inspire yourself and others!
There are times when looking at someone else’s progress can be inspiring. You can be genuinely glad for that individual’s success, and you can learn from her.
If a business owner has taken a failing company and turned it around, other business owners with struggling companies might be eager to hear that owner’s advice.
It works the same way with fitness goals!
Want better legs? Instead of looking at someone with great legs and feeling sad about yours, ask her how she achieved that look. You might learn that you can do it, too!
Focus on Joy
Theodore Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.”
If you’re comparing yourself to someone who’s physically worse off than you, you might feel good at first; but it’s ultimately an empty, inflated kind of joy.
And if you’re comparing yourself to someone who seems much more fit, you may be killing your joy and your motivation.
Instead, focus on what you’ve accomplished. Be grateful for it, and get inspired to do even more!